We're still not here to f*ck spiders (NSFW)

May 06, 2021

A couple of years ago, we delved into the world of crude Australian sarcasm and examined the bluntest example we could find of this in ... not here to fuck spiders.

This, along with its circumspect cousins, ... not here to put socks (or shoes) on caterpillars, and ... not here to lick stamps are generally used to mean 'well, I’m not here to waste time'.

I was delighted to hear the phrase again recently while watching the world premiere of Rupaul's Drag Race Down Under (the team have discussed drag queens and Drag Race before in our podcast on Polari).

I was interviewed about the swearing on the show by Patrick Lenton at Junkee, but there is a special place in my heart for this particular phrase.

As an editor at Macquarie Dictionary, it’s part of my job to investigate words and phrases regardless of their nature. I do have to admit, it’s much more interesting researching the usage of these types of colourful lexical items than whether the scientific name of a certain species of grass has changed.

And now, thanks to one contestant on Drag Race Down Under, Art Simone, perhaps the phrase not here to fuck spiders will end up going global.

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Josh - June 8, 2021, 11:47 a.m.

Your last post on this phrase mentioned my film We're Not Here to Fuck Spiders. Since then I've completed it and it's now doing a festival run. It won Best Australian Film and Best Australian Director at last year's A Night of Horror Film Festival, and won Best Film at Nooga Underground Film Festival in the US in April. It screens at a festival in Brazil in a few weeks, and then at Revelation Perth International Film Festival in July, with more to come. So I'm doing my bit to take this phrase global!

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